Swallow study at UNC

Well good news and bad news. Good news is that in the first 5 minutes of the swallow study (which is the normal amount of time Ethan spends drinking his bottle) Ethan did not aspirate at all! But the bad news is that they continued to watch him swallow for another 15 minutes and towards the end, he did start to silently aspirate. Therefore, the speech therapist (who performed the study) recommends that we continue doing the thickened bottle feeds until after his next surgery, when they will repeat the swallow study again. So I won't lie, I was EXTREMELY disappointed to hear about having to continue the thickened feeds - I walked out of there telling Dan that this news has ruined my entire day, and it was all I could do to fight back the tears. I hardly slept at all last night, I woke up every 1-2 hours and while I was awake, I prayed for Ethan to pass the swallow study with flying colors so we can start to have a little normalcy to our lives for once. Even though God chose not to answer my prayer the way I requested, I know we still made the right decision to do the swallow study this morning. As hard as it is to get the news that we are recommended to continue the thickened feeds, I know the speech therapist is just wanting to err on the side of caution. As I've said my entire life, "better safe than sorry". I just wish I didn't have to take my own advice and the advice of UNC.